Black Sheep

by Bleating Apocalypse

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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

      £3 GBP  or more

     

  • Black Sheep CD

    Both halves of "Black Sheep", "Black Sheep - Ram" and "Black Sheep - Ewe", on a physical CD. Comes in a very shiny cardboard sleeve lovingly hand-printed by Wooden Chef after eating a whole tub of wood glue. Featuring artwork by John Paul de Quay, and logo design by Trudi Bramall.

    Includes unlimited streaming of Black Sheep via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.

    Sold Out

  • Black Metal Interior Design T-shirt and Black Sheep CD Bundle

    Why get just a CD or a T-shirt when you can get both? Not only that, but you can save money too!

    Bundle includes:

    1. Both halves of "Black Sheep", "Black Sheep - Ram" and "Black Sheep - Ewe", on a physical CD. Comes in a very shiny cardboard sleeve lovingly hand-printed by Wooden Chef after eating a whole tub of wood glue. Featuring artwork by John Paul de Quay, and logo design by Trudi Bramall.

    2. Black Metal Interior Design t-shirt. These shirts were printed by Wooden Chef himself on high-quality Gildan Heavy Cotton shirts, because he loves his fans (when he comes down from his calpol-induced highs).

    Unfortunately the shirts are currently only available in "Men's" sizes, but Bleating Apocalypse encourages everyone to ignore the labels placed upon you by society and/or garments manufacturers.
    ... more

    Sold Out

  • Black Sheep CD + Logo Shirt Bundle

    Why get just a CD or a T-shirt when you can get both? Not only that, but you can save money too!

    Bundle includes:

    1. Both halves of "Black Sheep", "Black Sheep - Ram" and "Black Sheep - Ewe", on a physical CD. Comes in a very shiny cardboard sleeve lovingly hand-printed by Wooden Chef after eating a whole tub of wood glue. Featuring artwork by John Paul de Quay, and logo design by Trudi Bramall.

    2. Bleating Apocalypse logo t-shirt. These shirts were printed by Wooden Chef himself on high-quality Gildan Heavy Cotton shirts, because he loves his fans (when he comes down from his calpol-induced highs).

    Unfortunately the shirts are currently only available in "Men's" sizes, but Bleating Apocalypse encourages everyone to ignore the labels placed upon you by society and/or garments manufacturers.

    Logo design by Trudi Bramall.
    ... more

    Sold Out

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about

The evils of the internet laid bare; a harrowing tale of a man all too familiar with his mobile home; the moving journey of one of Britain's best loved forecasting personalities: these issues touch us all. And now they can touch you. In the ears.

These songs resonate the very plywood from which Wooden Chef was birthed.

credits

released December 4, 2015

Bleating Apocalypse is:
Tetanus Jabb - Vocals, Rhythm Guitar
Bloody Sunday - Lead and Rhythm Guitar, Backing Vocals
Colin Thunderskull - Bass Guitar, Backing Vocals
Vigorous Footjob - Drums
Wooden Chef - Corporate Solutions

Recorded, Mixed and Mastered by Vigorous Footjob at The Footjob Parlour
Artwork by John Paul de Quay
Layout by Colin Thunderskull
Logo Design by Trudi Bramall

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

Bleating Apocalypse Sheffield, UK

Pioneers of the new-wave of Easy-Listening Metal.

contact / help

Contact Bleating Apocalypse

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Track Name: A Song for Petunia
It started as a hobby, when I bought a mobile home
Killing in the trailer parks, with a caravan as my throne
Murder is my passion, caravanning is my love
Even though my membership was revoked by the caravan club.

My caravan she is lovely, there’s nothing I prefer
Her name is Petunia, I feel peculiar when I’m not inside her
My caravan is so wonderful, she’s the love of my life
If only it weren’t frowned upon, I’d make her my wife

HATE
In my caravan
DATE
With my caravan
BLOOD
In my caravan
IN LOVE
With my caravan

I drive around the country, with my caravan in tow
Doing gruesome murders in every place I go
I make no distinction, between victims old and young
Men, women and children dead, I kill everyone!

Petunia has pink curtains, and walls all painted cream
Even the room where I keep the corpses, has a lovely eggshell sheen
Petunia how I love you, you’re the apple of my eye
You’re the gorgeous house I never had, where people come to die

HATE
In my caravan
DATE
With my caravan
BLOOD
In my caravan
IN LOVE
With my caravan
Track Name: I Should be Sleeping
A gentle glow
Though not warming my face
And so life slows
Drips away without a trace
I could be doing so much more
But I'm reviewing airport floors

And so hours pass and go
And what I want to finish has not showed
And still you're sitting with me
Still sending pictures of fleas

Send it to its grave
My God you've never changed
Pictures of your food
I've never craved

Read my blog
Its about my colon
I do not have one
And ain't it great

And night descends upon the room
And within the dark and murky gloom
Comes a man with a gaping wound
And comes a face with a threatening tune

Look at my cat
Look at my cat
Ain't it wonderful
Ain't it wonderful
Don't you wish you had a cat like mine
Don't you wish you had a cat like mine

And so hours pass and go
And what I want to finish has not showed
And still you're sitting with me
Still sending pictures of fleas

Send it to its grave
My God you've never changed
Pictures of your food
I've never craved
I don't need to know
What you are eating
Still I look at it
I should be sleeping

Have you seen this
You need to see this
Please see this
Satisfy me

And night descends upon the room
And within the dark and murky gloom
Comes a man with a gaping wound
And comes a face with a threatening tune

Look at my face look at my face
Ain't I random
Ain't I alternative
Look at my face from a different angle
Aren't I fucking wonderful

And so hours pass and go
And what I want to finish has not showed
And still you're sitting with me
Still sending pictures of fleas

Send it to its grave
My God you've never changed
Pictures of your food
I've never craved
I don't need to know
What you are eating
Still I look at it
I should be sleeping

Oh it's so cool
You should try it too
Why be productive when you could be on the internet
Oh it's so cool
You should try it too
Why be productive when you could be on the internet

And so the internet generation descended into the depths of the intellectual void, culture in favour of grainy photos of their pesto-drenched vegan enchiladas sepia selfies and independent coffee shops

(Hashtag no filter)
Hashtag no future
(Hashtag no make-up)
Hashtag don't wake up
(Hashtag duck-face)
Hashtag fuck face
(Hashtag hashtag)
Hashtag fuck off
Track Name: Sun and Showers
28 years since I committed a sin
Since the storm of '87. hurricane breezed in
And my life was changed, my chances slim
When someone had hearsay and just called in
But I soldiered on and maintained my power
Not missing step, never seeming sour
But the whole ordeal had lasted for hours
A mixture of sun and a mixture of showers

And so I've pulled the rug from under you
And wool over your eyes
Behind the guilt looming, I hear the shouts
And sound of stormy cries
My sheer enthusiasm hid it all
And brought you all to tears
But when the curtain falls the winds tell all

And now observe my professional rise
Return to screen from forecasting decline
I ignore my critics and predict just fine
But nights are rough when it's just me and wine
And so I descend beneath the surface
My presenting is nothing and becoming worthless
Scream 'its not going to happen' and 'why is this'
Lying in a pool of vomit and piss

And so I've pulled the rug from under you
And wool over your eyes
Behind the guilt looming, I hear the shouts
And sound of stormy cries
My sheer enthusiasm hid it all
And brought you all to tears
But when the curtain falls the winds tell all

I can't eat and I don't sleep
A senseless wind that does not cease
But I will sow what I have reaped
And still the forecast I shall preach
And lifeless forms continually seep
Out of this world, sub-conscience creep
But I will sow what I have reaped
And still the forecast I shall preach

Hurricane it won't happen, won't happen, won't happen
Don't worry it won't happen, won't happen, won't happen

Hurricane it won't happen, won't happen, won't happen
Don't worry it won't happen, won't happen, won't happen

28 years since I committed a sin
Since the storm of '87. hurricane breezed in
And my life was changed, my chances slim
When someone had hearsay and just called in
And I thought that was that, career over
Human decline in a supernova
But now I see and it's in good measure
I'm a national God-damn fuckin' treasure

And so I've pulled the rug from under you
And wool over your eyes
Behind the guilt looming, I hear the shouts
And sound of stormy cries
My sheer enthusiasm hid it all
And brought you all to tears
But when the curtain falls the winds tell all